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Rishi (Remembering you again)

June 19, 2014

Update on August 12, 2014: 

In your loving memory, strength to your family. And make some robos, wherever you are.


Original post:

This came through fb, and brought back thoughts of two loving and brave parents. And of all the brave parents who have an abyss to cross everyday, yet they carry on with the small stuff like all others…

























It was sometime in March 2013, when I received a call from Loki… Loki? Yes Loki Balasaria my friend from CEPT days. Loki and wife Rini were visiting Goa with their two sons Rishi and Tanay and wanted to meet me and Raj. Of course I was more than willing to meet them after almost twenty years. Rini was doing her masters in planning while I was studying Urban Design at CEPT. We were this bunch of girls who hung out together, went for movies and generally chilled together. Loki at that time had finished Architecture and was faculty at CEPT. I opted for photography and therefore became Lokis student and I owe my foray into photography and black n white printing techniques to him.

Well, I went with my 16 year old daughter to meet this wonderful family at Taj Vivanta. Rini in her usual chirpy way introduced me to her 17 year old 12th grader son Rishi and a much younger naughty Tanay. We spent the entire afternoon chatting in her room over coffee and that’s when I got to know Rishi….. Rishi floored me with his sense of perception, observation and analytical acumen. For a while it was difficult to imagine that I was speaking to just a 17 year old. And the beauty is that to him the topic did not matter. It was as if he was an encyclopaedia. I could see the look of pride and joy in the eyes of both his parents as they recounted some of the recent proud moments. What also struck me was the connect between the two brothers despite the age gap, that lil protective big brother look. Later Raj my husband joined us and we visited our architect friend and sat through a presentation wherein Rishi again impressed me by the way he handled his lil brothers impatience to sit through. In fact I can describe Rishi in one word … And that is… Perfect…


16 June 2014…. While going the usual FB posts, I came across one by Loki mentioning about Rishis school having dedicated some event to him…. Dedicated… What the hell does that mean… It was almost as if I was doubting my senses and chiding myself for thinking negatively… My heart missed a beat and I kept saying, this can’t be true, no no it’s not true. After about an hour I got the courage to call our friend Amit and my worst fears were confirmed. Yes indeed Rishi was no more…. But how why…

Apparently it was in 2013 just after joining college at Manipal that Rishi had mild fall while playing basketball and we’ll that was it…. What??? Just a fall and the bright life gone…

To say I was stunned would be an understatement… By now my legs had weakened and I was going through the worst fears any parent has. OMG how are Rini and Loki. A silent prayer went out for them. Rishi was gone almost 9 months back and I did not know. I did connect with Rini a lil on FB but that was it… And that was before Rishi went. It never struck me that why wasn’t I seeing any fresh posts by Loki….

Losing a child is the worst nightmare for any parent and losing Rishi must have been worst than that. I met him for just that one afternoon and evening and he impacted my life in way that his loss became unbearable for me….

And to think that it was just a fall…. How many of us fall everyday…. How many of us tell our kids, it’s ok if U have had a fall, you are growing up. Our lives are indeed fragile.

Rishi has taught me something that I am going to remember for the rest of my life….


When it rains heavily and my arty sun roof leaks, I hate the puddles and fret till it is repaired….. From now on, those puddles won’t bother me…..

When I enter home after a long day at office and see the family room messed up… From now on that mess won’t bother me.

When I need to send that really important mail, and the net slows down, …from now on this will not frustrate me.

When I am trying to call someone and calls constantly drop…from now on this will not irritate me

When I have work goals and for some reason they get delayed,… From now on this will not despair me….


You know why ?

Coz losing Rishi was far far greater than any small problems….


From now on whenever I’m facing a situation of frustration, anger, …. I think of this angel Rishi and think ‘ losing you was a far greater loss…. And this problem at hand can be sorted but getting you back, I can’t.’…


Rishi you did your parents proud….. No doubt you are gone in physical form, you continue to live through us coz you impacted the lives of whoever you met….you brought sunshine wherever you went…. Maybe the God in heaven above wanted some more brightness and so he called you much before your time…. Will miss you son……


Sneha (Rano Aunty )

From → In Memoriam

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